Post-Adoption E-Magazine, July 2012
Post-Adoption Announcements
Photolisting: Now is the perfect time to raise foster and adoption awareness. If you have your own blog or website, consider adding our Photo Listing Widget to help raise awareness of foster children nationwide.
Would you like to help more children from your agency get adopted faster? Click here for a form to add children to our photolisting. This service is FREE to all states and includes a team of technical support and customer service staff to maintain the Photolisting.
Don't see any children from your state? Please contact your local officials to let them know you would like to see children from your state.
Blogging: Interested in Blogging? This is the perfect month to share your story. We're currently looking for guest bloggers for the following categories: Adoptive Parenting and Sibling Adoption.
Dealing with Night Terrors
Some children are placed for adoption after traumatic experiences. Some may have experienced abuse, tragic loss of a loved one, or simply being taken from the only home they knew. All of these experiences--and so many more--can then later present themselves through night terrors. Night terrors are much more than just the average nightmare. Night terrors, also called sleep terrors, are an extreme, yet expected, reaction to fear and emotional or physical pain from past experiences. If your child was in a car accident, for instance, in which a parent died in front of him/her, your child's night terror could be a reaction to that horrific memory. And it happens during sleep, so it can be difficult to comfort your child, as s/he will be disoriented and sometimes still asleep.
If you're unsure how to differentiate between a common nightmare and a night terror, here is a list of tell-tale signs to look for:
- Usually happens when the child has been asleep for two to three hours
- The child will bolt upright, straight out of bed
- Screaming can occur
- Increased heart rate and breathing
- Sometimes the eyes can be open, but the child won't be awake
- Because of the panic your child feels, there may be thrashing of arms and legs or huddling in the corner in fear
- Sometimes your child might try to escape whatever horror is haunting them, meaning they run from you or from their room and try to make it to another place, a safe place
- Very difficult to wake up your child, especially when compared to an average nightmare.
As a parent, you'll undoubtedly wake up when your child experiences a night terror. There will be a lot of noise and screaming. When you go to check on your scared child, s/he may not recognize you, as s/he will probably be sleeping still. When a night terror hits, you won't be able to comfort your child as you normally would. Sometimes you'll feel that all your efforts are in vain. But there are some things you can do to calm the situation and make for a less terrifying experience, for both you and your child.
- Your first instinct to hold and comfort your child may help. Depending on the exact situation and night terror, simply holding your child can help calm him/her, even if your child isn't awake. Sometimes just your presence can calm things down. However, this may not be true with every situation. Sometimes, physically touching your child can further aggravate the situation. You'll just have to judge each night terror separately.
- Sometimes playing soft music can help calm down your child. Even though s/he is asleep, his/her mind and body will react.
- Counseling is always a good idea when there's an underlying trauma that has yet to be dealt with, which is usually the case with night terrors. Dealing with, healing, and moving forward from a traumatic incident should help alleviate night terrors.
- Night terrors are often caused by specific triggers. For some children, they happen only when they're stressed. For others, it's a more constant and continual thing. Once you find your child's triggers, you can then work to avoid them.
- Keep your household calm before bedtime. This can help set the right mood for your child to sleep peacefully.
While night terrors may become a common experience in your home, it can be dealt with appropriately. The most important thing you can do is to be understanding, empathetic, and loving. Getting over night terrors is a process; it won't happen right away. Be patient. It will be a learning experience for everyone, but it also has the ability to make your family one stronger, tighter, more loving unit.
Post-Adoption Blogs from AdoptionBlogs.com
Top Ten Tips Road Trips With Children
I was anything but excited my when my phone beeped to tell me I had a text message. It’s not that I didn’t like getting text messages from my wife- to the contrary. In fact, I was really looking forward to hearing updates about what was going on at the hospital, but her message rattled me a little bit.[more]
Rad Kids Are Radishes
This week I found out a few things about moms with Reactive Attachment Disorder kids. First, they have a sense of humor and call their kids Radishes–so cute and so perfect. [more]
Post-Adoption Community, News & Events
Adoptee Support - BM Search Frustration/Rant
Adoptee Support - What's eight decades anyway...
Adoptee Support - Taking back birth name
Birth and Adoptive Family Relationships - Adopted Adults-common issues and coping strategies
Add your non-marketing adoption related event at no cost. Get started today by registering for an account.
Post-Adoption Tip of the Month
As a parent, it's important that you're on the same page as your partner or spouse, especially when it comes to discipline. Take some time and thoroughly discuss your beliefs and the basic rules of the household. That way, there won't be confusion when it's time to implement these rules.
In Your Words
"I was adopted at 8 months old by a wonderful family who are my only mother and father. It's very easy to make a child, but much harder to sacrifice and give your life to the happiness of your family. I couldn't ask for a better family. With that being said, I still wondered and looked for a while for my bith parents. I just want to know where I come from and who I look like. I dont want anything from them; I would just like to see them. I guess it leaves a little hole in your soul, but I know I have been blessed." - MJM
Have a question? Comment? In Your Words is your way to reach out to the adoption community and get tips from others and share important information.
Share Your Thoughts with Us
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