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A Dad Is A Dad - Rebecca L. Gold October 11th, 2002
We, as adoptive parents, in many ways have to be PROACTIVE and to anticipate the issues our children may face. We need to try to prepare for our children’s adoption challenges and to plan ahead about how we will help as parents. We shouldn’t let normal and predictable issues in adoptive family life surprise us or cause us to overreact.
What Are the Chances? - Amy D. October 11th, 2002
Our mothers were neighborhood friends, though mine no longer lived in that neighborhood. What are the chances of that happening? Slim to none. I decided to look for my brother and found him on the internet, in another country. I e-mailed him; he did not believe me, and sent me a list of childhood questions for the guy I work with (trick questions included). I ended up mailing him my original birth certificate and a copy of one of her handwritten envelopes to me. He also went to his mother in the meantime. The wall went up very quickly after he went to her. He even sent a mean e-mail to the guy I work with about me.
My Perception and Reality - Sharon Robinson October 11th, 2002
The waiting was agonizing. Finally, I decided to try e-mailing her through Classmates.com but there was no response. A few more days dragged by. My family kept calling to find out if I had received a reply. My son, Robert, had always wanted to find his sister. He hated being an only child. I was hoping to surprise him on his birthday, but no such luck. Between running for the phone, checking my e-mail every five minutes, and waiting for the postman, I was losing my grip on reality.
For Adoptive Parents and Adoptees - Michelle Porter October 11th, 2002
Adoptive parents...if a desire to learn about their birth family makes you jealous or anxious, or if you're afraid that the discovery will cause you to "lose" your adoptive child, well, then the love bond can't be that strong to begin with. Adoptees...it is only natural to have curiosity about "where I came from", but finding your biological parents will not be a cure for arguments with your mother or a lack of understanding with your father. People are human, and everyone has faults. Ultimately, we all have to go on as individuals.
Six...and Counting...? - Christine Jack October 11th, 2002
There was our tiny son, Dima, in the arms of a caretaker, Dreama. Although he was eleven months old, his little body was more like a 6-8 month old. Months of emotion spilled over upon seeing his dear face. At that moment, I thought what an awesome God we have to put two ordinary people in a far away land only to embrace a beautiful gift from God.
A Teenage Adoptee's Letter to Her Birth Parents - Chrystal October 04th, 2002
Last night, I was sitting at home talking to my dog. I was thinking about you, Mom, and I was thinking about you, too, Dad. I started crying. I seem to do that a lot when I think of you. Do you know my name? Do you know that I'm a healthy happy teen; that I've never forgotten about you, I've never wanted to? Hm, its kinda funny, isn't it? I mean, adoptees all over the world think this way, I'm sure of it.
Deserted - Sharon Lamb October 04th, 2002
I know what it feels like to feel like you don’t fit in. You cannot compare what you eat, your likes or dislikes with your adoptive family because what you have inherited is not from your new family. I grew up wondering who I looked like, what their likes or dislikes were, and did I have other brothers or sisters? As it turns out, my birth mother and birth father had another girl in 1958 and gave her up for adoption as well. She was placed in another home and to this day I have not been able to locate her.
Maintain Control - Susan M. Ward October 04th, 2002
One of the challenging roles of parents is to stay out of the "ick," to remain detached from our kids controlling behaviors. As one therapist said, "Every time they suck us in (we get mad, or yell, or show our annoyance), they get a zing." Stay out of your kids poor behaviors. Try and show them that their choices impact them, but everyone else's life goes on.
39 Years and Counting… - Nancy Odierno October 04th, 2002
Receiving my non identifying information was as if I were given permission to peer through a peek hole while the door remained locked. In January, my file will go back into archives…. When I read that statement a little girl cries out “I don’t want to be an archive!” But alas I do not have the key to unlock that door. Only she has the power to sign a consent form and thus release a portion of my identity.
A Promise Kept to Our Mother! - Audrey Jones September 27th, 2002
With the help of Grandmother Barton, Mom signed her parental rights away. No choices back then. This baby was taken to a foster home for three months where she was given a name of Caroline Gayle Barton. She weighed 5 pounds 13 ounces. No hair and a cute button round face.
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