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Adoption Week e-Magazine Formerly Adopting.org Newsletter and Adoption.com Newsletter June 25, 2002 To subscribe or unsubscribe, visit www.AdoptionWeek.com. ************************ IN THIS ISSUE ************************ 1. ANNOUNCEMENTS: - New adoption financing program - 52 new country-specific international adoption websites - "Adoption", featuring the Swabbs - Share your story on Canadian television - New AdoptionForums.com - Debut of "reunions in limbo" chatroom - Call for articles 2. NEW ARTICLES 3. ADOPTION NEWS 4. ADOPTION BOOK CLUB - adoption book review 5. MEET NEW ADOPTIVE PARENTS 6. ADOPTION BUZZ - recent message board discussions 7. FEATURED WAITING CHILD 8. ADOPTION GEM - inspirational thought 9. ADOPTION SITE SPOTLIGHT 10. JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT - clean weekly humor 11. FEATURED ADOPTION PROFESSIONAL 12. ADOPTIONSHOP.COM PICK - review of an adoption product 13. SPEAK OUT - contributions from our readers 14. ADOPTION ONLINE GROUP REVIEW 15. ADOPTION POETRY 16. ADOPTION CALENDAR - adoption events, seminars, & chats*************************************************************** | |
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1. ANNOUNCEMENTS NEW ADOPTION FINANCING PROGRAM AdoptionFinancing.com is now offering a brand new adoption financing program. Fill out the application at AdoptionFinancing.com and they will work with their network of more than 30 different lenders to find the right financing for your needs. 52 NEW COUNTRY-SPECIFIC INTERNATIONAL ADOPTION WEBSITES Adoption.com and Adopting.org have launched a new website for nearly every country with an active international adoption program. Each website features many country-specific resources related to adoption, travel, tourism, history, waiting children, adoption agencies, translators, currency converters, weather, news, maps, message boards, books, and dozens of other links to resources. You can find links to all of these new websites at InternationalAdoption.org, or visit some of the most popular countries: http://China.Adoption.com, http://Russia.Adoption.com, http://Guatemala.Adoption.com, http://Romania.Adoption.com, http://Korea.Adoption.com, http://Kazakhstan.Adoption.com, or http://Vietnam.Adoption.com. "ADOPTION", FEATURING THE SWABBS Hallmark's series on adoption will be featuring the Swabbs, this Sunday, June 30 (7p.m. CEN). Watch and see how adoption has touched their lives as part of the Adoption.com family! SHARE YOUR STORY ON CANADIAN TELEVISION If you have found the family member you are looking for, but haven’t reunited with this individual and are interested in sharing your reunion story on a National Canadian Television Network Program, please contact us at 1800-adopthere or info@parentprofiles.com for more details. One of the parties needs to be Canadian. NEW ADOPTIONFORUMS.COM The old Adopting.org Expert Forums have become AdoptionForums.com. Many of the forums have volunteers or experts to answer questions on specific adoption-related topics. These forums are a hybrid between a chatroom like AdoptionChat.com and a message board like AdoptionBoards.com in that there will be constant discussion on a smaller number of adoption topics. To create a better environment for you, these boards are now password-protected, so you need to register first before you can post. Join now at AdoptionForums.com. DEBUT OF "REUNIONS IN LIMBO" CHATROOM Most reunions have ups and downs that throw the reunitees for a loop on occasion, especially in its early years. If you are having a "limbo" type experience, come and talk it over with those who've "been there-done that" themselves. Co-hosted by birthmothers, April and Judy, on Fridays: 5p.m. Pacific, 6p.m. Mountain, 7p.m. Central, 8p.m. Eastern. CALL FOR ARTICLES Adoption.com and Adopting.org will soon launch an online library that will ultimately contain thousands of articles related to adoption, infertility, foster parenting, parenting, special needs and other related topics. We have already had more than 500 articles contributed. If you haven't written anything, we encourage you to share your story and your experience with others who can benefit from it. You can contribute any articles you have written at AdoptionWeek.com or to editor@adoptionmedia.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 2. NEW ARTICLES The views expressed by the authors are solely their own, and for which the authors are responsible. These views do not necessarily represent the views of Adoption Week e-Magazine. The Second Rejection - new article by Marcy Wineman Axness "I think there is a stage that some people go through where they feel rejected, really, by life. That all these things that could have been, or, along a different kind of life trajectory, would have occurred, simply aren't going to be--too much of life has already been lived. And people withdraw. The anxiety is just too great, the disappointment is too great." http://e-magazine.adoption.com/article.php?articleid=74 The Psychology of Self-Defeatism in Adoption Reform - new article by Damsel Plum Each side of the triad has had its share of bad press. We have all read about or seen fictional portrayals of birthmothers who abandon children in dumpsters or who come back to stalk and reclaim their relinquished offspring. NCFA poster-girl Carol Sandusky is notorious for her prodigious talk-show blather blaming her psychological problems on being sought out and found by her abusive birthmother. Likewise there are news stories about potential adoptive parents who knowingly buy black market babies or who fake pregnancy and murder pregnant neighbors to claim their children. These sensational stories (which represent the extreme edge of the adoption experience) sink into the public consciousness and help contribute to the triad's sense of indignity and lost control. http://e-magazine.adoption.com/article.php?articleid=75 What We Have to Unlearn As Older Child Adoptive Parents - new article by Susan M. Ward Regular parenting techniques i.e. rewards, charts, stickers, will motivate them. Our kids may not have the internal self-regulation and self-esteem required for them to be positively motivated. They may have come from orphanages or foster homes where this type of reward system wasn't used. Or, our kids may suffer from various biological or psychological issues i.e. ADHD, bipolar, PTSD, or attachment disorder that makes it impossible to work for rewards until they've undergone therapy, therapeutic parenting, or other interventions to teach them the requisite internal tools that will help them be motivated to do well. http://e-magazine.adoption.com/article.php?articleid=76 Read these articles at AdoptionWeek.com Back to Top ***************************************************************  Switch your ISP (Internet Service Provider) to AdoptionISP.com and save money by reducing your bill to only $12.95 per month. Most of you are probably paying about $22/month. In addition to saving money, $3/month will go to support adoption causes. Sign up now at AdoptionISP.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 3. ADOPTION NEWS Rochester Couple Adopts Baby Abandoned at McDonald's http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.startribune.com/stories/462/2924755.html Adoption Unites Trio of Brothers with Margate Couple http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/local/broward/sfl-ssec24jun24.story?coll=sfla%2Dnews%2Dbroward Resident Lends Hand to Chinese Orphans http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.greenwichtime.com/news/local/scn-gt-orphans1jun24.story?coll=green%2Dnews%2Dlocal%2Dheadlines Grandmother: Shayne Can't Wait to Come Back Home (PA) http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/tribune-review/news/s_77575.html Parents of Adopted Children Angry over ABC Comedy 'My Adventures in Television' http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.news-journalonline.com/2002/Jun/19/SCETV3.htm Ex-foster Child Sues Case Workers (FL) http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/local/florida/sfl-ffoster20jun20.story?coll=sfla%2Dnews%2Dflorida Poll: Race, Age Aren't Big Issues in Adoptions http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2002/06/19/adoption.htm Dolphins Lend Hand to Miami-Dade Foster Kids http://www.adoption.com/includes/frame.php?url=http://www.gopbi.com/partners/pbpost/epaper/editions/wednesday/sports_d3f0ce3c639cc1e0002b.html If any of the links to the news articles do not work, Click Here for a list of headlines. Back to Top *************************************************************** 4. ADOPTION BOOK CLUB 
Adoption Healing: A Path to RecoveryThis a unique book. The reader is provided with a description of the unfolding of the adoptee’s personality from birth, detailing each developmental milestone along the way, followed by different method on healing the adoptee’s wounds, including inner child work, healing affirmations, visualizations and anger management. Joe Soll is an adoptee, a psychotherapist in private practice, the director of Adoption Crossroads, conference chair of the American Adoption Conference and a former adjunct professor of social work. For more information on this book, visit http://adoptionshop.com/cgi-bin/products/JSO00001.html. Back to Top *************************************************************** 5. MEET NEW ADOPTIVE PARENTS Outdated material has been removed. Please visit ParentProfiles.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** Adoption is music to our ears...now it can be for you, too.  Adoption.com's new adoption CD, "Adoption...The Songs You Love", is dedicated to everyone who has been touched by adoption in one way or another. ORDER YOUR CD! http://adoptionshop.com/cgi-bin/products/ADP00022.html Back to Top *************************************************************** 6. ADOPTION BUZZ Poetry: - A Mother Unknown Outdated material has been removed. Please visit AdoptionBoards.com. Adoptive Children Joining the Existing Family: - Also on Adding a Child Outdated material has been removed. Please visit AdoptionBoards.com. Open Adoption: - OK A Parents...Tell Me How You Really Feel Outdated material has been removed. Please visit AdoptionBoards.com. Success Stories from Foster Child Adoption: - Finally Finalizing Outdated material has been removed. Please visit AdoptionBoards.com. If any of the links above do not work, visit Adoption.com for direct links to these discussions. For more online adoption discussions visit AdoptionBoards.com, AdoptionCafe.com and AdoptionForums.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 7. FEATURED WAITING CHILD Leslie is a bright, friendly child. She enjoys going to the mall, shopping, outside activities, sports, and skating. She is soft spoken and quiet, but can hold a conversation once initiated. Leslie enjoys school and makes A/B's. Her favorite subject is language arts. She makes friends easily and gets along well with her peers. Leslie takes medication for mild depression and asthma. She has strong goals and ambitions and would like a career in the military. Leslie is very attached to her younger sister, Kylah, and would like to be adopted with her. A family for Leslie will need to make her feel safe and secure. She will need stability and understanding of her connections to her birth family. She maintains contact with her older adult sister and grandparents. AdoptableKids.com is a free community service of Adoption.com featuring more than 1,000 children awaiting loving, permanent homes. Back to Top *************************************************************** 8. ADOPTION GEM When I look at an old drunk and he smiles at me, I see a smelly, dirty person who probably wants money, and I look away. My kids see someone smiling at them and they smile back. When I hear music I love, I know I can't carry a tune and don't have much rhythm so I sit self consciously and listen. My kids feel the beat and move to it. They sing out the words. If they don't know them, they make up their own. When I feel wind on my face, I brace myself against it. I feel it messing up my hair and pulling me back when I walk. My kids close their eyes, spread their arms and fly with it, until they fall to the ground laughing. When I pray, I say 'thee' and 'thou' and 'grant me' this, 'give me' that. My kids say, "Hi, God!!! Thanks for my toys and my friends. Please keep the bad dreams away tonight. Sorry, I don't want to go to Heaven yet. I would miss my Mommy and Daddy." When I see a mud puddle, I step around it. I see muddy shoes and clothes and dirty carpets. My kids sit in it. They see dams to build, rivers to cross and worms to play with. I wonder if we are given kids to teach or to learn from? - Unknown See a daily adoption gem at Adoption.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 9. ADOPTION SITE SPOTLIGHT This week, our adoption spotlight is shining on: AdoptionCards.com. Sending a free virtual card at AdoptionCards.com is easy! Just follow the instructions outlined on the page. After you have completed the card, you will be shown a confirmation page and then a preview page where you can send your virtual card. After a card is sent, the recipient will receive an e-mail with a hyperlink that can be clicked on to view the virtual card you sent. For a list of our favorite adoption websites, visit AdoptionSites.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 10. JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT BUT, DADDY... My husband and I took our two-year-old daughter to the home-improvement store. Madison got tired of walking, so my husband let her ride on his shoulders. As he walked, Madison began pulling his hair. Although he asked her to stop several times, she kept on. Getting annoyed, he scolded, "Madison! Stop that!" "But, Daddy," she replied, "I'm just trying to get my gum back." Back to Top *************************************************************** 11. FEATURED ADOPTION PROFESSIONAL Bethany Christian Services - Modesto, CA Modesto, CA Toll Free: 1-800-BETHANY Contact: Branch Director: Lynette Stime bcsmodesto@bethany.org Bethany keeps the calls of birth mothers completely confidential. They offer help by connecting them with someone in their community who can continue to provide them with counseling, support, and guidance free-of-charge. Bethany can also help in obtaining medical care, legal aid, or even a place to live during pregnancy. Bethany works with birth mothers and adoptive parents, placing hundreds of children with adoptive families each year. The children of adoption are as individual as the birthparents who conceived them and the adoptive parents who raise them. Like all children, they grow best in loving families. For more information on Bethany Christian Services, visit http://www.Bethany.org. Back to Top *************************************************************** 12. ADOPTIONSHOP.COM PICK With Eyes Wide Open CD - Only $19.95 
Interactive CD is for parents about to adopt an international child with life experiences. Parents who choose international adoption, and who know that children have lived in orphanages, foster care or nurseries before they join a new family, often live with apprehension and questions about their child’s past and about the “child of their dreams.” For more information and ordering instructions, visit http://adoptionshop.com/cgi-bin/products/CHS00004.html. For more adoption products, visit http://adoptionshop.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 13. SPEAK OUT Hi, I have a question. I need a name change on my daughter's soc. sec. card, and every time we go, there is some problem cos she is adopted. Can someone advise me? I need to get with a lawyer and see what input he can give me also. Thanks. - Mrs D. Dilks (crunkant@hotmail.com) --------------------------------- My name is Angel Broughton. Lashbrook is my maiden name. I have been searching for a few years now to find any information on any memeber of my birth family. I was born in Lubbuck, TX 1977 on the 8th of July. If you know of any little girl that was born on that date, please contact me at wanbecop2@yahoo.com. I do know that I was born to a 16 yr old named Winne. My Mother said that she was mentally handicapped, along with my father being the age of 65. So, any information would help; I will not give up. Like other people, I don't want a new family, I would like to know where I come from and health information. I already know that I have an older brother named Norman and a twin sister, but I don't know what her name is, being that the story was that we were separated at birth and adopted out. So (if anyone has) any information, please e-mail me. --------------------------------- I was born and adopted in New York state in July 1969. I want to find out who my birth mother is, but I do not want her to know that I have found out. I'm not looking for a reunion, just information about where I came from. The state government won't reveal her name unless she and I both sign forms of consent. She may never sign, and I don't want to sign because I don't know if I want a relationship with her. Who can help? - Darren --------------------------------- I am searching for a birth sister who was adopted by a Latvian family in Toronto, Canada. Her birth name is Cindy Anne Habibi. She was born March 17, 1958 at St. Michaels Hospital in Toronto. She may be living in Saskatchewan or Saskatoon with the adopted name of Josie. Cindy, ALL your birth relatives are anxious to find you. I have found all of them and you are the only missing puzzle piece left. Please contact me at jmmtype56@yahoo.com. I am your sister Judy; you and I have the same mother. So much to tell you and not enough space to do it in. Please, if you get this message, contact me. Love you lots, Judy --------------------------------- To Speak Out and share your opinion or a comment, or to respond to a message, e-mail editor@adoption.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 14. ADOPTION ONLINE SUPPORT GROUP REVIEW Here's a recent post from the Transracial Adoption support group: Mary: Have your adoptions been foster care conversions to adoption or agency/private? My question is just because some of what I'll suggest might be more specific to one type or the other. We found that getting our group started by putting a little blurb in the local foster care monthly news letter was a great way to get some initial interest generated. We just said anyone interested in getting together to meet have fun and support one another as transracially adopted families please contact... Really important to have that contact individual identified and committed to taking the calls. We still put something in there about 3 times a year. Then after we had just 3 identified interested families we began meeting. Once a month is still all schedules allow for with the exception of special events we do (a summer picnic, a Christmas program, and one fall trip apple picking or something), but that group after about 3 years is now about 20 families strong. We can't all make it every month, but of course individual relationships have formed among various families and or their children and we make time to be together between meetings. We keep the times informal; a different mom hosts each month, and we just let the kids play (some structured ideas and some just run and fun). We usually solicite our older children to do some child care of the toddler age during the group and allow the moms at least an hour of the 2 -2 1/2 hours we're together to be kid free with the exception of our tiny ones. The info, support, tears wiped, laughter shared have been invaluable. Also contacting local private agency foster care agency or adopt only agencies and asking them for a forum to mention that a group is forming or exists will and has generated some interest. We've offered ourselves (not the whole group of course, but different members) to speak at informational meetings that agencies have for recruiting adoptive families in their transracial adoption program to share our experiences and offer our group as support. Agencies love the support and the connection to share with potential adoptive families who have all the what will people say, how will I manage their hair, and skin care, etc. questions. I also have some little business-type cards I carry in my wallet and in situations where I encounter other transracial families where it seems they are open or seeking (you'll know based on your conversation) for such a group. I give them a card and write down our next meeting date and place and tell them to call the number (mine) for directions, if they'd like to attend. We are always looking for others who need what we've all found wonderfully helpful. My childrens' best friends are kids they've met through play group. My kids see other kids like them (as they put it, "you know, mom, rainbow families"), and they invite them to join our group. Hope the info is helpful. God has blessed our family with another special family to have a close and connected relationship with where the kids love and support each other, the parents get each other and we're doing life together as we travel this different but wonderful path. - Lisa Ellen To be part of this group, visit http://adoptionlist.com, register, and join. Back to Top *************************************************************** 15. ADOPTION POETRY JUST THINK... You are here, not by chance, but by God's own choosing. His hand formed you and made you the person you are. You are one of a kind. You lack nothing that his grace can't give you. He has allowed you to be here in this time in history, to fulfill his special purpose for this generation. - by Roy Lessin For more adoption poetry, visit AdoptionPoetry.com. Back to Top *************************************************************** 16. ADOPTION CALENDAR CHAT SCHEDULE: Sunday: Evening with Loretta for reunion support group chat at 6pm Pacific, 7pm Mountain, 8pm Central, 9pm Eastern. Monday: Evening with Karen DeLuca in adoptee room! Join her at 4:30pm Pacific, 5:30pm Mountain, 6:30pm Central, 7:30pm Eastern. Evening with Carol Bird in birthfamily support group chat, hosted in Search and Reunion chat room at 5:30pm Pacific, 6:30pm Mountain, 7:30pm Central, 8:30pm Eastern until about 11:00pm. Eastern. Evening with Dr. Art Becker-Weidman, ask him questions on attachment therapy and treating children with trauma-attachment disorders. Join him in the Adopting.org chat room at 2pm Pacific, 3pm Mountain, 4pm Central, 5pm Eastern. Evening with Kathy; discuss ideas on getting started in the amazing journey of adoption. Join her at 7pm Pacific, 8pm Mountain, 9pm Central, 10pm Eastern in the Adopting.org chat room. Tuesday: Birthmom chat with Jennifer in the BirthMother.com chat room on the 2nd, 4th, and 5th Tuesday, at 6:30pm Pacific, 7:30pm Mountain, 8:30pm Central, 9:30pm Eastern. Birth mom chat with Linda in Search and Reunion chat room at 6pm Pacific, 7pm Mountain, 8pm Central, 9pm Eastern. General adoption chat with Jamie in the Adopting.org chat room at 7pm Pacific, 8pm Mountain, 9pm Central, 10pm Eastern. Wednesday: Pre- and adoptive parent chat with JJ and friends - Help as you begin the adoption process. Hosted in Adopting.org chat room at 5pm Pacific, 6pm Mountain, 7pm Central, 8pm Eastern. Join an informative chat on the ups and downs of reunion hosted by Sabra since 1997. Talk out your next step and share your experiences in search and reunion at 7pm Pacific, 8pm Mountain, 9pm Central, 10pm Eastern in the Search and Reunion chat room. International adoption with Donna at 5pm Pacific, 6pm Mountain, 7pm Central, 8pm Eastern in InternationalAdoption.com chat room. Parenting issues for adoptive/foster parents with Dimasmom in FosterParenting.com chat room at 6pm Pacific, 7pm Mountain, 8pm Central, 9pm Eastern. Thursday: Evening with Colleen Buckner, search expert, in Search and Reunion chat room at 6pm Pacific, 7pm Mountain, 8pm Central, 9pm Eastern. Open adoption with Stephanie in Adopting.org chat room at 9pm Pacific, 10pm Mountain, 11pm Central, 12pm Eastern. Friday: Meet Louise and others in a forum for parents with children that may have physical challenges and/or emotional challenges in the InternationalAdoption.com chat room at 6pm Pacific, 7pm Mountain, 8pm Central, 9pm Eastern. Transracial and general adoption with Trish at 7pm Pacific, 8pm Mountain, 9pm Central, 10pm Eastern in the InternationalAdoption.com chat room. If you are having a "limbo" type experience with your reunion, come and talk it over with those who've "been there-done that" themselves. Join co-hosting birth mothers, April and Judy, in the Search and Reunion room on Fridays: 5p.m. Pacific, 6p.m. Mountain, 7p.m. Central, 8p.m. Eastern. Saturday: Older child adoption/foster care behavioral issues with Jerry in FosterParenting.com chat room at 6pm Pacific, 7pm Mountain, 8pm Central, 9pm Eastern. For a listing of times and descriptions and to attend scheduled chats, or join the live chat, visit AdoptionChat.com. ADOPTION EVENTS: INTERNATIONAL ADOPTION FAMILY PICNIC Finally Family Adoption Agency and The Big Smiles Foundation June 29, 2002; 11a.m. - 2p.m. Oak Park, IL All attendees are asked to donate a childcare item such as a package of diapers, baby bottles, etc. All donations will be sent to orphans overseas. A picnic lunch will be served and information about both home studies and international adoption will be available. For more information, visit http://www.finallyfamily.com. ABC'S OF INTERNATIONAL ADOPTION Dillon International, Inc. June 30, 2002 Lubbock, TX Contact: Calessa Phone: (806) 794-4519 FREE ADOPTION/FOSTERING WORKSHOP: Bring a Child Into Your Life Adopt a Special Kid (AASK America) July 2, 2002; 7 - 9p.m. pacific Oakland, CA You will receive information about AASK's no-fee complete services, the process, and the financial support. Contact: Andrea Phone: (510) 553-1748 ext. 12 For more information, visit http://www.adoptaspecialkid.org. 17th ANNUAL ARC SUMMER INTENSIVES Center for Family Connections and Adoption Resource Center to Present the 17th Annual ARC Summer Intensives WHAT: Five days of training around issues of adoption, foster care, kinship, guardianship, and other complex blended families. The Intensives are based on Dr. Joyce Maguire Pavao’s Normative Crises framework, years of clinical experience, and consulting and training expertise. The workshops utilize family systems theory, which is the basis of Dr. Pavao’s work. Systemic thinking is woven throughout the design of each workshop. WHEN: July 8 - July 12 WHERE: Cape Cod, Provincetown, MA CONTACT: Nicolle Dirks at (617) 547-0909 or nicolledirks@hotmail.com for information and registration. First come first serve…limited space. For local listings, regional seminars, and many other adoption events, visit AdoptionCalendar.com. Back to Top ___________________________________________________________________ CALL FOR CONTENT Adoption Week Magazine is looking for well-written adoption-related articles, poems, quotes, book reviews, news, event announcements, product reviews, photos, successful adoption and reunion stories, clean humor, job openings, letters to the editor, reviews of adoption websites, product recalls, information on adoption legislation, great deals on adoption and family-related products, other adoption-related content. To submit content, or if you would like to be interviewed or to nominate someone for an adoption service award, please visit AdoptionWeek.com. TO ADVERTISE Would you like to advertise in the Adoption Week e-mail magazine? For more information, visit AdoptionWeek.com. REFER IT We hope you enjoyed this issue of Adoption Week Magazine and encourage you to forward it to others who might find this information useful. TO SUBSCRIBE OR UNSUBSCRIBE If you want a free weekly e-mail subscription to Adoption Week e-Magazine, or would like to unsubscribe, visit AdoptionWeek.com. DISCLAIMER This e-magazine is provided as a free community service, and by using and reading it you agree to the terms and conditions as posted at AdoptionWeek.com. Adoption.com makes no warrantee about the accurateness of any information in this magazine, and does not endorse any adoption professional, adoption product or other adoption service. If you have received this e-mail erroneously, or do not agree to the terms of this disclaimer, please unsubscribe. | |
